“The Challenge”’s Nurys Mateo Opens Up About Experiencing Suicidal Ideation: ‘I Didn’t Want to Hate Myself Every Single Day’

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Charlotte PhillippSun, November 8, 2026 at 3:05 AM UTC

Nurys Mateo in 2025Credit: Maya Dehlin Spach/WireImage -

Nurys Mateo, who competed on multiple seasons of The Challenge, is opening up about her mental health struggles

The 31-year-old reality TV star revealed in an Instagram video that she was experiencing suicidal ideation earlier this year

“I’m sharing this to remind you that you’re not alone,” she said

Nurys Mateo is opening up about the mental health struggles.

The Challenge veteran, 31, got candid in an Instagram video shared on Saturday, Nov. 7, revealing that she was experiencing suicidal ideation earlier this year.

“I’m so glad I decided not to off myself,” she shared in the front-facing video. “It’s not funny, but it’s funny now. I laugh at my pain, okay?”

The reality TV alum shared that she went through a difficult 2026 and struggled after not confiding in others about her issues.

“I had such a hard year this year. I was dealing with a lot of mental issues and I definitely was ... lowkey suicidal,” she revealed. “In the worst place I have ever been in my entire life. I hated life, I hated everything, I was battling every single day with my mental [health] telling me it would be better if I wasn’t here.”

“I didn’t want to be there. I didn’t want to hate myself every single day. I didn’t want to feel not worthy enough to be alive,” added Mateo, who won $60,000 and came in second place during The Challenge: Battle for a New Champion and has also appeared on other Challenge seasons, Ex on the Beach and Are You the One?

Mateo said that she “only confided in one person” and that person “pushed me deeper into that depression.”

She ultimately chose to work on herself and opened up to others.

“I knew I was in that mental place, but I also knew that too many people count on me, and also it’s very selfish to do that, so I just literally did everything I possibly could to get out of that phase of my life,” the Battle of the Eras alum said.

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“I’m so grateful that I finally spoke about it with other people, other friends, that could actually help me. Not even that could help me, but wanted to help me,” she added.

In her caption, Mateo also said that she isn’t “sharing this for sympathy” and instead hopes to help others who may be experiencing similar crises.

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“Healing doesn’t happen overnight and it’s not linear,” she wrote. “From the outside looking in, my life probably looks beautiful. I have followers, I make money, I travel and I have so much to be grateful for. But most of you probably would’ve never guessed how many battles I was fighting internally while still showing up with a smile.”

“I’m sharing this to remind you that you’re not alone,” the reality TV star added. “We never truly know what someone is going through, so be kind to others but especially to yourself.”

Nurys Mateo in 2024Credit: Paul Archuleta/Getty

Several of Mateo’s Challenge costars shared messages of support underneath her post, including Olivia Kaiser, who wrote, “I’m so happy you are here ❤️.”

“Love you so much❤️,” her Cutthroat costar Deb Chubb wrote.

“I love you so much, my friend! I’m so glad you’re still here! 🥹🙏🏾” added her Battle for a New Champion costar Kyland Young. “Thank you for sharing this vulnerability, allowing your pain to become something that can help others.”

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health challenges, emotional distress, substance use problems, or just needs to talk, call or text 988, or chat at 988lifeline.org 24/7.

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Source: “AOL Entertainment”